Before you read, understand this is my pissed off, inner-child and if you do happen to read it, deal with it……

…….Is that why I was put on this earth? To be the guy that everyone else gets to shit on? I mean, what the hell did I do to deserve being treated so horribly? Somebody help because I am lost here. What I do know, however, is that for the past month or two, I have been in a horrible mood. A straight-up miserable mood actually. I know that I have done and said some things that I regret, who doesn’t? But the way I see it, I have gone above and beyond what I needed to do to try and rectify what it is that I soured in the first place. But, sadly, what I have been doing has not been reciprocated or even accepted for that matter. So, fuck it. I am sick of caring. I am sick of being trampled on. I am sick of getting an attitude especially when I am trying to mend a situation. I am sick of having an ass made of myself and I am sick of being purposely martyred. I mean, jesus, who the fuck would put up with this shit?? Who the hell sees where she is coming from?? Nobody that I have talked to, and thats for damn sure. If people actually told me once in a while that what she does is normal, then I would sit back and keep my mouth shut. But nobody does. Another thing, if you cared about somebody as much as you say you do, don’t you think that one would make sacrifices in order to sustain a relationship? Maybe that’s just me, I don’t know. But, what I do know is that what it boils down to is a lack of compromise, and not from this party either. I made it abundantly clear that I have been willing to make sacrifices. I don’t like the fact that you smoke weed every week and especially that you smoke it with people that I don’t even like in the first place. Sue me. I don’t have to like certain people and I don’t have to bite my tongue anymore. I can hate whoever the fuck I want to and if it is because you smoked weed with them, so be it. That’s what kind of person I am and that is nothing new to you or me. Basically, what it boils down to, as childish as it sounds, is that you don’t care about me. And thats it. Period. Nobody treats people that they care about this way. Nobody goes out of their way to do or say something, especially when knowing that the other person is bothered by that particular something, on a regular basis. Let’s get serious now. You say it is a problem that I don’t trust you but as you would say, “It’s a two way street.” You don’t do anything to help me and my trust problem towards you. I can’t fix this trust thing on my own and like I said, you damn sure don’t seem to care. I don’t think that I ever met somebody so selfish and unappreciative in all my life. I think that the “she takes you for granted” statement was the best advice I have ever heard, ever. And for the record, disregard the comment Karissa made on my last entry. Things are exactly the same as they were on February 1st and, pathetically, they are probably destined to be like this the rest of my life. Or atleast until this moron gets a clue, whichever comes first…….

Whew, that felt good. I guess the only thing left to do is smoke a fat blunt now…..


9 thoughts on “

  1. trust shaun, andrew its chelle and alii we both love you and we think that you need to just know that your something worth going after and anyone who doesnt see that is a moron, your awesome and someday someones going to appreciate that, keep your head up, and dont worry about it, if its meant to be, in the end it will work out, but for now try to go out and explore your options. and we also wish u didnt go to bed at 7 even tho u did get up early today, its our last night of break . ( if break is even what u want to call it, more like an extended weekend) but whatever we love you byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

  2. Hey buddy….keep your head up man. Your an awesome person and some day you will find that one person that will appreciate you the way you are supposed to be. WE ALL know how great of a person you are! If you ever need anything just give me a call. And as Shaun said…I think i fell in love with you too.

  3. andrew … the love of my life.. what is going on!!! you know i loooove you i already told you that i would marry you so what is the problem?? miss you lots and i hope everything gets better… stay sexy : )

  4. Andrew…prom date and i sorry i wish i could have seen you guys the rest of the weekend but some unexpected things came up and im sorry that i missed you guys i hope that you are feeling better becuase no one should make you feel like you do right now no matter who they are…so you do what you need to and be strong and like lauren said before you’ll find that person that will want all the things that you have to offer and they will cherish that because you are an AWSOME guy dont get yourself down be proud of who you are and what you have to offer because your a really great guy and i know that soon enought you will figure that out, love you!

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